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Wes Welker gifts $100 bills after Kentucky Derby win

The Kentucky Derby has always struck me as one of the most unusual of American sports traditions.

Women wear hats that don't fit through doorways, and men fashion outfits Craig Sager would find garish. People suck down mint juleps like they're not terrible and wait hours to watch a collection of horses with names like We Miss Artie and Vicar's In Trouble gallop for a couple of minutes.

After it's over, a lady with a camera strapped to her head rides on a horse and interviews a tiny man. It's a great, big, Bob Costas-narrated fever dream.

Tom Brady and Vince Wilfork were both spotted at Churchill Downs on Saturday. As was their former Patriots teammate and current Broncos wideout, Wes Welker, who clearly had himself a very successful afternoon.

"He said he just won the Kentucky Derby and proceeded to walk down the line until the police officer stopped him," Derby attendee Marc Blandford told USA Today. "I think six of us ended up with $100 bills."

"Everyone was pretty much freaking out," Blandford added.

In summation, a multimillionaire professional football player was spotted walking down a concourse at the Kentucky Derby tossing off Benjamins like Jack Nicholson's Joker. Have I mentioned the Kentucky Derby is a fever dream?

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