If you're one of the millions of Americans who struggle with the challenges of being pee-shy, file this post under the horror/non-fiction section.
Washington Redskins quarterback Kirk Cousins took to Twitter on Wednesday to explain the intimacy of the NFL's mandated drug-testing system.
And you thought the life of an NFL player was all fist-pumps and Gatorade baths. This situation gets weird --OK, weirder -- when you realize the testing associate likely needs to get real close to the action for fear of specimen tampering.
Which begs the question: Whose puppy do you have to run over in a past life to end up becoming a specimen verification officer?
The answer is Taylor Swift's. You have to run over Taylor Swift's puppy.
Follow Dan Hanzus on Twitter @DanHanzus.