If you still determine your fantasy draft order with a random draw just before your draft, you really need to stop. Fantasy Draft Day is one of the best days of the year and you shouldn't sully it with something so rudimentary. We're creative people, we can do much better than this.
Hey look, I pulled the ace, I get first pick! Booooooooooooor-innnnnnnnnnnng! Haven't any of you even seen an episode of "The League" on FX?
There are some leagues I've heard of where they like to determine the draft order similar to the way the NFL Draft is conducted; the worst team gets the first pick. That's a terrible idea. That encourages the person with a bad team to tank the rest of the season to make sure he or she gets the first pick the following year. If you're going down this road, you should have the enthusiasts who wins the consolation bracket get the top pick in the draft. And if you have teams that don't get into the consolation bracket? Well, they will pick last.
And even then, you can still do much better than that. This is fantasy football, it's supposed to be fun, remember? So I've come up with six great ways to determine your draft order. I'd be happy to hear yours in the comment section (like you haven't already run ahead to do this) or hit me up on Twitter @adamrank with the #fantasydraftorder.
Eating contests could be the way to go, as my editor Marcas Grant and I discussed. But that's promoting gluttony and Kevin Spacy from the movie "seven" still creeps me out. (Google that one, kids.)
And one more note, absolutely not:
And without further ado ...
It doesn't even need to be football-based either. In fact, it would be much more enjoyable if you made it based on one of those "Real Housewives" reality TV shows because you know some guys would study it. Anything pop culture works. Of course, Fabs would be lost if the categories included TV shows or movies made after 1998 and bands who have released albums after "Too Fast for Love".
My neighbor's league is going to do this for its 2013 draft. I didn't care for it at first, but think about lighting up the person who won the league last year. Or you could target the owner who always seems to take your draft picks.
Also known as "Cornhole" in some parts, a mini tournament is a nice option. Unless Chris Wesseling is in your league. This could be substituted with any of those other, uh, skill games you learned in college. You know, the ones where you used a ping-pong ball. I'll leave it there.
My guys Neil Dutton and Ollie Connolly used NASCAR drivers from a particular race, but why not cut out the middle man? Find the nearest go-cart track and go at it. And if that isn't feasible, Mario Kart is an approved alternative.
Punt Pass and Kick
The classic! Of course, this isn't an option in my league of record with my chums from Corona, Calif. Mainly because of this guy. Side note, anybody remember the kid who dominated this event like a decade ago? The kid who had a beard at 14? What happened to him?
This is probably the best option there is. If your entire league lives close by, conduct the tournament the night before. Otherwise, you can drop it to two-minute quarters for the preliminary rounds and go at it. You'll thank me later.
Adam Rank has never won an award. For anything. We don't mean to be harsh, but it's true. You can follow him on Twitter @adamrank. Oh, and if you liked this (right!), check him out on the latest "Dave Dameshek Football Program". Which, come to think of it won an award. So Rank has won something meaningful. Yes, meaningful unlike this latest post. Am I right? But follow him on Twitter, please. He's taking us to lunch if he gets 25 more Twitter followers today.