Chad Johnson wants to sign with Eagles for free WiFi

Chad Johnson wouldn't need much to jump off the couch and join the reigning Super Bowl champs.

Just a spot in the Eagles' receiving corps... and connectivity for all his devices.

Let's crunch Ochocinco's demands because this is a steal.

Verizon FiOs' best package runs $79.99 a month in the City of Brotherly Love. That means Johnson would return to the gridiron for $959.88 -- $999,040.12 less than a 10-year veteran like him would get under the veteran's minimum.

And remember: Ochocinco was at his best with a quarterback named Carson. The 40-year-old is the kind of bargain that'll make Eagles GM Howie Roseman a back-to-back NFL Executive of the Year.

Enjoy imagining the NFL's Celebration Master in a city like Philadelphia until this WiFi-for-play deal is struck.

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