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"Dancing with the Stars" no longer is for C-list celebrities but apparently third receivers on the depth chart, too. I feel like somebody should call ABC right now and let them know they have Donald Driver on the show, not Greg Jennings.
"Dancing with the Stars" has featured some NFL legends (see Hines Ward above) over the years, and Chad Ochocinco, too. Now the show seems to be reaching worse than the Jacksonville Jaguars making a first-round draft pick.
If your best choice for an NFL player is Donald Driver, maybe it's time to take a few plays off so doctors can run some concussion tests on your show. And I don't mean to knock Driver. He seems like a good guy, just not the ratings-grabber you'd expect.
With that in mind, here are six better choices for "Dancing with the Stars."
And without further ado ...
The show producers didn't even make the best possible choice from the Packers. Seriously, if they ever saw Raji do his version of the discount double check, they'd know this is a no-doubter. (And seriously, why are those hipsters always hanging out at State Farm?)
Dancing Stevie drew a lot of heat for his end-zone celebrations during the season. Being on "Dancing with the Stars" would give him the perfect outlet to show off his moves and not pin the Bills with a 15-yard penalty. But he'd probably find a way to drop the mirror ball trophy if he won.
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Tony Scheffler
I know what you're thinking: "Why in the world would anybody put Scheffler on this list?" And it's understandable until you take a look at this celebration, and then we have a sure-fire winner -- and probably the Lions' best chance for a championship.
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Victor Cruz
Having Cruz on the show might seem a touch gratuitous, but it'd be nice to see if he could master some moves outside of the salsa.
All right, this is completely gratuitous. And you have to figure this was the first call the producers made (and Cruz right after that). But the biggest key would be if Tebow's steps in the waltz would be as long and drawn out as his throwing motion.
For years, Lewis has shown the world he's really just a dancer trapped in a football player's body during his pregame gyrations, which I guess are considered dancing. (Though it looks more like Ronald Miller's African anteater ritual from "Can't Buy Me Love.") And the best part, as Dave Dameshek likes to point out, Lewis and his Ravens teammates already wear ballet pants.
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