The petition, housed on the White House website and filed under the category of "Human Rights," includes the following call to arms:
"We, the Citizens of the Great State of Texas, and Dallas Cowboys fans worldwide, have been oppressed by an over controlling, delusional, oppressive dictator for way too long. Request the Executive Branch's immediate assistance in removal of owner and GM, Jerry Jones. His incompetence and ego have not only been an extreme disappointment for way too long, but moreover, it has caused extreme mental and emotional duress."
As we post this, 412 U.S. citizens have signed the petition. Only 24,588 more are required for Obama to take this seriously. We've dispatched Rosenthal to monitor this development closely.