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Like/Dislike: Don't trust Larry Donnell's advice

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What we are talking about:

  • Philip Rivers

    Fear the bolo. Fear it!

  • Kirk Cousins

    Yeah, sit this one out please

  • Life hacks

    You'll thank me later

I like Larry Donnell.

And this goes beyond the fact he plays fantasy football. That's cool. But it's not 1998 anymore. Most younger dudes in the league grew up playing fantasy football as kids and it's as much ingrained in our culture as frapping. So let's get over ourselves a little bit and geek out every time an NFL player mentions fantasy football.

So you can imagine my admiration goes beyond the fact that he benched himself and lost because he started Vernon Davis instead. And yes, that started a bunch of hacky jokes from people, "Hey look, NFL stars are just like us." Or maybe, "How can we be blamed for benching Donnell when he benched himself?"

Please stop. JUST. STOP.

I found it refreshing that he benched himself. As somebody who has interviewed plenty of NFL players over the years, I tire of the bluster of these guys who think they're better than everybody in the league. Like seriously, you could ask the most mundane player in the league who the best person at his positon is, he would likely say, "Uh, myself."

Seriously, Eli Manning probably believes in his heart he's the best quarterback in his family. Well, he does have two Super Bowl rings, so he might have a point. Fine. Go ask Kyle Orton if he's the best quarterback in this league. See what he says. Ask him if he's starting himself in fantasy football this week. I would imagine he is. (And if he's reading this, dude, I'm in a super-deep league. Can you throw some to Robert Woods? Appreciate it.)

But enough with this. It's cool to sometimes admit somebody is better than you. There's nothing wrong with it. You can push your ego aside.

For instance, let's say there was a comedian fantasy league. And if I was playing in it, I would certainly draft myself. However, if I had just one spot open for a cynical, bald comic I would surely start Bill Burr at that spot. You know why? Because I'm (expletive) realistic. There might be a chance (not really) I would end up beating Burr in points, but it wouldn't matter because I would be on the bench. It's Bill mother bleeping Burr for crying out loud.

There's no shame in that. It's not that I don't believe in myself (well, I don't), but I can recognize there might be somebody in my profession who is a little bit better than I am. So why can't more football players do this? (I mean, it's the exact opposite of Hollywood starlets who never believe they're pretty. Like Zoe Saldana sits there in interviews and talks about how she was awkward when she was young, she never got dates and she's so unattractive. Which isn't true. Congratulations on the twins, by the way.)

NFL players don't do this. They all think they're the best at everything. It's annoying. Thankfully, Larry doesn't do this. He sees a guy like Vernon (expletive) Davis on his roster and he starts him. Which is a reasonable thing to do. So I'm not here to make fun of Donnell, I'm here to give him credit for realizing there are other guys out there who are pretty good at the position they play.

But seriously, Larry. You (expletive) up. You totally should have started yourself. The matchup was good, you get a ton of targets, but I have nothing but like for you, though.

Let's proceed in what our homepage editor Patrick Crawley called the best use of a soap box in world history. If you ever saw Patrick's name in this space and wondered who he acts like in the real world, he's a lot like the dude from "Undatable". No, not the cool guy; the other guy. Not in a bad way.

A big hand to stats mavens Bill "Sudsy" Sudell and Careen Falcone for dropping the knowledge.

And without further ado ...

I'm happy our collective outrage is aimed at those who yell profanities at the crowd. In other words, the really (expletive) important stuff. Good news for Geno Smith!

Normally I would advise fantasy holders with Kirk Cousins to swig some hair of the dog after last week. But now you have the Seahawks coming off a bye. So, yeah.

Alex Smith was dang-near legendary against the Patriots on Monday night. That could have been Super Bowl XLVII, if Kyle Williams had been able to hold on to the ball.

I don't know if you caught this, but the Falcons started a tight end at tackle during their loss to the Vikings. At tackle. I'd like Matt Ryan a lot more if this was at home in Atlanta. But if you have another QB on your bench, I would go with him.

The game plan for Blake Bortles was just to the right of Sean Hanity in Week 4 against the Chargers. Expect the Jags to take the wraps off their prized rookie this week. I don't like him as a QB1 just yet, but he's a nice stash.

I will not answer your questions about Tom Brady. Because you really need to drop him from your fantasy team right now. The only reason you keep him and contemplate playing him is because of the name on his jersey. You need to stop that. It's not getting better.

I'd feel bad for Brady if it wasn't for the millions he's earned, the Super Bowl titles and Gisele.

Andy Dalton is one of those guys I'm not outwardly against. I like him as a starting quarterback in the league. I just see a lot of running happening from the Bengals this week.

Hey guys, I'm getting closer to playing Mike Glennon in some leagues. Remember our deal?

I'm not sure if Tim Tebow has ever cursed in his life. But you just know football's version of Ned Flanders came rootin' tootin' close after the news in Buffalo this week.

Is this thing with Kyle Orton really happening? I honestly can't believe it. I mean, is this going to make the Bills' shaky offensive line better? Probably not.

Kyle Orton looks like the guy who sat at the back of your math class, wearing a jean jacket with a white wool collar. And the only thing he would ever say while he was at the back of class was, "I will never need to know this (expletive)." Which is true because he will end up using the metric system almost exclusively.

ImageBig ups to one of my guys on Twitter (sorry dude, I lost the tweet) pointed out Orton looks just like Chibs from "Sons of Anarchy. Well played, young man. It was killing me because I knew he looked like somebody but couldn't think of it. I thought Johnny Depp and some others, but dang, it's Chibs. Especially with the hair style. It was driving me crazy.

I'm not terribly opposed to Darren Sproles this week. But where McCoy has earned our trust over the years, I'd practice a bit more caution with Sproles unless it's a PPR.

Benny Cunningham saw more action against the Cowboys in Week 3. It's really time to roster him. I wasn't impressed with his running, but he was getting opportunities.

One understudy I would really like, but can't is Antone Smith. He's too limited when it comes to standard leagues, but could be on your PPR radar.

C.J. Anderson must not practice well, because when I watch the Broncos I don't see a true RB1 in Montee Ball. This will not get easier for Ball this week against the Birds.

The moment, and I mean the (expletive moment) we drop Chris Johnson to the bench he has a great stat line. Don't believe it. Numbers lie.

Donald Brown has been crushing our fantasy teams. If this makes you feel any better, when I'm extremely bullish on a guy, realize I'm playing him in my important leagues. And I lost last week because Brown hasn't been able to get it going. I hate the matchup this week.

But isn't this the game where Brown will break out of his shell and just smoke the Jets? You look at the turmoil the Jets have faced, plus a trip to the West Coast.

I look at Stevan Ridley on my roster and think of the talent he has, but this team hasn't looked good at all. I'm not to the point where I drop Ridley, but I can't play him.

Whenever I watch Arian Foster, he always strikes me as a bright guy who is going to end up retiring early like Robert Smith did with the Vikings and go into TV.

If you have Lynch on your bench, I can't implore you enough to grab Robert Turbin on your roster. Lynch has already missed time with an injury and he's already had his bye.

ImageFantasy Football Life hack: It always seems fun to grab somebody's backup just to screw with them. But don't risk your roster's depth to do it. Then you're going to end up like Jax in "Sons of Anarchy."

The Lions have been tough on fantasy running backs, though a lot of that stems from Eddie Lacy not playing well against them. So I have C.J. Spiller a little lower than usual.

Speaking of busts from Alabama like Trent Richardson, what's up with Eddie Lacy? He finished with a fine fantasy stat line. But I watched every snap of that game and Lacy didn't look good. This would be the perfect time to try to deal him to somebody in your league.

The Browns need to take the Bernard Pierce approach with Ben Tate. Let the guys who are better at running the football, well, Run. The. Football. You'll thank me later.

What to do with Alfred Morris? I'd love to have him on most of my teams because I'm in deep (expletive). But if I had Arian Foster, for instance, I'd bench Morris for sure.

So Shonn Greene is now that dude who came over for your party, but won't leave now that you've cleaned up and want to go to bed.

Benjamin has replaced Cordarrelle Patterson on most of my teams. Sources told me Patterson doesn't know the playbook and they really can't give him the ball as much as they would like

.

Don't be so quick to dismiss Jarius Wright. He worked extensively with Teddy Bridgewater on the second team. More importantly Wright was getting open whereas CP was not.

I get it; Megatron was dookie last week. But to borrow a phrase from Aaron Rodgers, "chill the (expletive) out." Well, maybe that's not what he said. Give Mega another week before you come at me with the trade offers and stuff like that. I know it's been frustrating but he's been there for us. We owe him that much

Andre Johnson seems like his best football is behind him. It was easy for him to flourish with bad quarterbacks when he was a strapping young man (in football terms). Not now. And especially with somebody better than him on the other side.

I'm still not feeling Marques Colston or Kenny Stills. I can never start those guys.

I'm tired of the "X receiver doesn't need a good quarterback, look at Josh Gordon last year." It's just lazy and doesn't have much merit. Just look at Larry Fitzgerald during the Max Hall years.

Speaking of which, we could be headed that way once again as the prognosis for Carson Palmer isn't encouraging. So we could see some more Drew Stanton.

And Wes Welker has one of the best possible quarterback options, and I'm not in a place to fully commit to him. I need to see more.

Mohamed Sanu is one of my favorite dudes. He's that dude whose great at everything. He's probably a hoss at Beirut, too. But he could be taking a lesser role this week.

Pierre Garcon is one of my favorites, and Kirk Cousins seems to like him. But he's on my bench against Seattle.

Markus Wheaton was one of my sleepers headed into the season, but he hasn't done much with it. Great matchup this week, but he hasn't earned our trust. (Watch, this will be the week.)

ImageI did notice I spent most of Monday Night Raw fast forwarding through it. I stopped for Ambrose. I did watch the Intercontinental championship match, which was grand. But I ended up just going over to read the recaps and see if there's anything I need to really watch.

We saw some signs of life from Jason Witten. Which was great. But not enough. Great enough matchup last week, but this looks like a job for Williams now near the goal line.

Jordan Reed is getting close to returning soon. But really, I can't trust him once he returns.

Jared Cook has been a bust. Thankfully for St. Louis, Jeff Fisher doesn't have a link to Justin Hunter or else he would probably trade for him.

A lot of people believe the Patriots can win this week. Seriously? I get it; they have Tom Brady and Bill Belichick so things are great! Yeah, that's what everybody said when the Cowboys dynasty was in its final throes. The Cowboys still had Aikman, and Emmitt and Irvin! Nothing could go wrong. But it did. When you lose depth, you lose what makes you great.

Can you trust Stephen Gostkowski going forward? If this offense is going to continue to be as bad as it looked, I'm not sure we can trust him anymore. Which is troubling because he was probably auto-picked for your team.

ImageI know I mention this every year, but we can all agree college overtime is the absolute best. Plus, it would give all of the Peyton Manning defenders off our backs, because he wouldn't ever lose to a coin toss. That being said, could you imagine the fantasy football ramifications if a game went into three or four overtimes? It would be so rad. We need the college overtime for that reason alone.

ImageThank you again for all of the names you submitted. We didn't get a chance to mention Cam Newton previously. And he's a guy who I'm going to avoid until he's completely healthy. Speaking of which, how thankful is he this game isn't being played on the shoddy turf at Soldier Field?


For the record, you can submit your fantasy questions to NFL Fantasy Live, Michael Fabiano or me on Twitter. But realize, NFL Fantasy Live has 270K followers, and Fabiano has 165K. Me? Just four. See, the odds are better I will answer your question, so hit me up both via Twitter or via Facebook. And if you follow him on Sundays, he'll quote "The Wolf" from "Pulp Fiction" and then it's game on! Although, it's tough to catch me on Facebook. Twitter is your go-to." Plus seriously people, I'm not taking your tweets after Midnight. I'm into the #HashtagWars via @Midnight.

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