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Like/Dislike: Eli Manning lost in translation

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What we are talking about:

  • Matt Ryan

    Great Week 1, expect more

  • Kelvin Benjamin

    This guy is the truth

  • Sons of Anarchy

    What did I just see this week?

Congratulations to the city of Buffalo, the Buffalo Bills and the Bills Mafia on new owner Terry Pegula. Things are looking up for the Bills organization and its great fans. Jim Kelly is cancer free! The Bills knocked off the Bears in Week 1. And now the team is going to be in Buffalo forever. The only way things could be any better would be if Scarlett Johansson announced that she was leaving Paris and moving to Buffalo to join the Bills Mafia.

And with the way things are going in western New York, I wouldn't count it out.

I really like the Bills' fans and couldn't be happier for them. I had season tickets for the Chargers during the middle part of the 2000s, and the Bills came to town in 2005. The Bills Mafia took over my section of the Jack Murphy Stadium parking lot. I was amazed, too, because the Bills were in the midst of a 5-11 season. But the fans were out there in full force. Of course, I couldn't help myself and wandered into the mix. The fans couldn't have been more gracious and welcoming to me and my new bride, Rosie McGee. Food, beverages, games of Beirut were all offered up. A dude let me wear his Fred Flintstone Water Buffalo Lodge hat (which is kind of gross in hindsight, but whatever). Even this year at the Pro Football Hall of Fame, the fans were amazing as evidenced by this video from Fan Pass. So I've always had a huge affinity for the Bills Mafia. They are great fans.

And as a child of football divorce who lost the Los Angeles Rams during the 1990s, I know how much it sucks to lose a team. I'm still not over it, though you might not have noticed that I lovingly refer to the football franchise in the midwest as the St. Louis Football Club. So I was really rooting for Pegula to get the franchise to keep it in Buffalo where it belongs. This is absolutely great news.

I also understand this has nothing to do with fantasy football. Or does it? Maybe this is the kind of thing that will inspire C.J. Spiller to great heights this season? Or if not, at least the team is still in Buffalo.

A quick footnote, I feel bad for the kid on Twitter who asked me last night if he should start Spiller or CJ2K. I told him CJ, without thinking the initials could mean either person. So if you're reading this right now, let me tell you when I wrote CJ I truly meant, oh look I really need to begin this column. We have so much to get to and I already spent a huge chunk of your time talking about the Bills.

Speaking of the Bills, in honor of Jon Bon Jovi's failed bid to buy the team, you guys should adopt one of his songs as an anthem just to thumb your noses at him. It really doesn't matter which one because they all sound the same. Let me know what you guys choose, because you really need to do that. I also hope to get out to Buffalo some time to celebrate with you. I owe a few of you a Molson or six.

Let's proceed in what our homepage editor Patrick Crawley called the best use of a soap box in world history. Or something like that.

A big hand to stats mavens Bill "Sudsy" Sudell and Careen Falcone for dropping the knowledge.

And without further ado ...

Ryan Tannehill would be a sneaky start this week. He's been pretty good against the AFC East with at least two touchdown passes in six of his last nine. I just don't have the guts to start him.

I sometimes feel like I'm Andy Dalton's biggest defender, pretty much anywhere. He's been dynamite against the NFC, with nine touchdowns and one pick in his last three. But he's just outside the top 10 for me. Barely.

Sometimes I wish I could just be a fantasy robot who could coldly type in the numbers and not look at the names, or the rounds I drafted my players. Seems like it would be a pretty good social experiment to conduct some year. Not this week.

I'm excited Cam Newton has a new weapon to work with. That's exciting. Newton had two rushing touchdowns and a pass TD in his only start against the Lions. I want to give him another week.

Eli Manning doesn't even crack my list of top 24 quarterbacks this week. I'm not even sure he'd top the list of 32 quarterbacks.

We mentioned in this space previously that while the Cowboys' horrible D will give opportunities for Tony Romo to step back and sling it, it also gives defenders the chance to get loose in pass rush and hit him repeatedly.

The Week 1 game was a clear indication of why you shouldn't put any credence into the Romo lovers' assertion that he's clutch because of his fourth-quarter passer rating. Romo is great when other teams are playing prevent defenses. So of course he's going to have huge numbers. His fourth-quarter passer rating was nearly perfect against the 49ers. (And that was my point with this tweet, but the internet is still waging war on sarcasm, so some of you didn't get it.)

The good news for the Cowboys is you guys are the worst team in the NFL, at least according to this. If I was doing the old alternative rankings the Cowboys would be my selection for top pick in the draft right now. They have to be the leaders in the clubhouse. Enjoy Marcus Mariotta next year. Because even if they aren't the worst, other franchises lower have their QBs.

The Seahawks' D allows around eight fantasy points to QBs at home, just over 12 on the road. Both tops in the game. Sorry Philip Rivers, you're sitting.

I'm on the fence about RG3 this week. No, not whether to start him or not. Rather, if you want to keep him on your roster or not. I wouldn't even touch him if he was on the wire.

EJ Manuel plays one of the smartest games from a quarterback I've seen. And it means absolutely nothing in fantasy. Quarterbacks should get bonus points for winning. #Idea

Oh wait, why am I complaining? I have Foles in my League of Record, against my chums in Corona, Calif. And I just made the tough decision to go Luck over Brady in my big-time 20-player keeper league.

Matt Cassel is one of the most maligned starting quarterbacks ever. He's started for three NFL teams. THREE! But he's never started for my fantasy team. Nor his alma mater USC.

ImageA show I should have given up on this season is "Big Brother". Well, maybe not. Christine is still the most loathsome for me, and I can't stand it if she gets a chance to win the whole thing. Frankie was my guy for so long, but he's going to be out-smarted by Victoria who just made the biggest game move of her BB career so late into the season. Victoria is akin to a player who hasn't done anything for 12 NFL seasons and then becomes MVP of the Super Bowl.

ImageAll right, prediction time: I have to believe Derrick is going to win the whole thing. The undercover cop has played the game so well. Victoria has done well as one of the best floaters of all-time, but when it comes down to judge, Derrick will get it for his overall game play.

ImageSorry, one more thing. But why in the name of Great Caesar's Ghost do you push the Pandora's Box deal? You know it's not going to end well. I want to go on Big Brother next season and be the one person in the entire history of the show to be all Pandora's Box? Nah, I'm good.

Hang on to Ben Tate if you have him. There's no reason to do anything rash. But there is a real good chance he gets "Drew Bledsoe'd" when he returns because West has looked impressive.

But seriously, every guy I love in preseason ends up getting drafted by my friends in my League of Record. Oh well, I might have to start floating some smoke screens along the way.

On that note, I was happy when my good-friend Frank H. took Jamaal Charles before I had to. You'll never bench Charles, but the Chiefs' offensive line is miserable and Andy Reid has a history of ignoring his players a lot like he did with Shady during his final season in Philly. Good news for Charles holders this week is Reid is good for a few over-corrections this year.

Lamar Miller, man. You had so much promise but it's just not going to work out for you. I know the Dolphins want to keep him in the mix. But Knowshon has really forced their hand here.

I don't want to get too excited about C.J. Spiller because he took advantage of the Bears who just didn't want to play defense in Week 1 (maybe ever again). Spiller had the workload, but it was another situation where Fred Jackson still looked better. I'm waiting for clarity on this.

Joique Bell was the bell-cow (pun INTENDED) running back for new coach Jim Caldwell. And Reggie Bush looked great out of the backfield as a receiver. I'd play Bell and Bush if I had to, but I'd still prefer Ingram and Moreno in Week 2.

Four running backs ran the ball for the Falcons in Week 1. Steven Jackson was the bottom rung of that ladder. The other three guys were way more impressive and should get more touches.

As predicted in this space, Khiry Robinson is going to frustrate fantasy enthusiasts to no end this year. His touchdown was the biggest "derp" for Ingram holders. Like of course Robinson scored first.

Stevan Ridley is the most-talented back in New England, but yeah, dude's buried deep in that dog house. He's on the verge of being cut from my team.

Jonathan Dwyer wasn't super impressive. If Ellington does ever miss time (God forbid), I really have a sneaking suspicion Stepfan Taylor is in the mix there. But I'm a homer.

The Titans, however, are really pushing it with their backfield committee. If I'm not mistaken, 20 dudes carried the ball last week (probably).

Toby Gerhart had 109 rushing yards in his last meeting against Washington in 2011. But he's battled some injuries and he's behind Moreno, Ingram and even West right now for me.

I mean, I really feel like an (expletive) after I avoided Lynch at all cost this summer. I know it's just one game, but if he does that for 16, Skittles for the first 20 to tweet me right now.

Hey Danny Woodhead, yeah, I was just curious if you were going to join us this season. Actually, take another week off and we can reconvene next week.

You are not so lucky Doug Martin. We wanted to see a little more from you last week and yeah. The St. Louis defensive front is pretty stout, so why don't you take the week off.

Keep James Starks on your radar as the injury reports are released this week. Although, Starks was one of the top handcuffs vultured in most fantasy drafts this year. I would damn people for the practice, but I won a league with Larry Johnson years ago.

I wasn't so much a fan of Arian Foster on Twitter this week. I think his heart is often in the right place and he's often unintentionally hilarious. But he probably should take a few tweets off.

Let's say you have Maurice Jones-Drew taking up space on your roster. Remedy that with LOS HYDE! How is it possible San Francisco was able to steal this guy? How do you feel Titans?

ImagePretty much look at any team that could use a running back right now. Or just look at the Colts. You didn't think it was a good idea to pick up LOS HYDE to push Trent Richardson? Wait, did the Colts pass on him? Wait, I just looked it up. SF traded up to get LOS HYDE, and jumped the Colts by two picks. (See most people would have fronted and not given you this stream of consciousness. Not Rank!) So let's just pretend the Colts were indeed going to take LOS HYDE!

But damn, the Colts are really in a jam because of Trent Richardson. If you watched the game last week, Ahmad Bradshaw was the guy who looked explosive out of the backfield and showed a lot of burst when he had the ball. The Colts really need to reach Richardson and get him to trust himself and just hit the hole. He shows way too much hesitation and no confidence. And you can't blame this on not knowing the playbook. He has been there long enough to get it.

Oh my God, I was never happier on Sunday than when Hakeem Nicks ended his touchdown drought. I can't tell you how much I mark'd out when Nicks was denied earlier in the game.

Nothing makes a fantasy enthusiasts more worried than to hear a guy like Alshon Jeffery has a hamstring issue. Oh man, the poor Bears' receivers.

Anquan Boldin is Mr. Week 1. Now it's time to perhaps look at some other options because I'm looking for the Crabtree over-correction this week.

I fear for rookie QB Derek Carr in this contest going up against J.J. Watt. That makes all of the other Raiders' skill guys a very risky proposition here.

But a word to the wise, I do play in the #HashtagWars most nights at Midnight on the East Coast. Which means it's probably the worst time to ask fantasy questions.

How is it possible the Packers don't have a great tight end to rely on, fantasy wise? Send me your other great #UnsolvedFantasyMysteries.

I'm telling you, with the internet's "war on sarcasm" I can almost guarantee you at least one person will tweet, "your (sic) in (sic) idiot, I would never sit Nelson" and not ironically.

Dwayne Bowe is back everybody. I know, contain your enthusiasm. I did add him in a league where he was available. Going up against Aqib Talib is not when I start him.

Brian Quick is the SLFC receiver to roster at this point as it was him, not Kenny Britt or Tavon Austin who got the targets. I'm not ready to start him.

Oh man, I never thought it would come to this, but Keenan Allen is somebody I would leave on the bench in two receiver leagues. It's a tough call, but the matchup just stinks.

This will probably be meaningful to one of you, but I would play Harvin over Allen this week. There is no other Seahawks' receiver I would start over him, though.

Although, I would go with Allen over DeSean Jackson at this point. I need to see a little more out of RG3 and Garcon is truly the only guy who has proved his worth.

Marqise Lee is going to have something to say before the year is over. But for right now, he's benched.

Seriously, what the heck Cowboys? There hasn't been a bigger waste of money for a no-talent performance since "Utopia" appeared on FOX. So not that long ago, I guess.

John Brown will be the most-dropped guy on NFL.com right after he fails to score this week against the New York Giants.

Congratulations to Larry Fitzgerald Sr. who acted like a soccer dad and called out the Cardinals' organization for not getting his son the football. Do you not remember the Max Hall era in Arizona? The Birds are building a winner in the desert and Larry Jr. is part of something special. Take the wins and don't worry about individual goals.

ImageOh (expletive). Do us fantasy enthusiasts sound this stupid when we complain about our guys not getting the ball enough? Well, maybe. I mean, I have no real vested interest in the Cowboys winning, but will be upset if my guy doesn't score. I guess this is akin to somebody being a Bears fan and being upset if the team wins and your fantasy guy doesn't score. Don't be that guy. Or girl.

I took a chance on Danny Amendola very late in drafts. Hey, why not? But if you need to clear some roster space, he looks pretty expendable at this point.

White has a tough matchup on paper. But is Matty Ice throwing him the ball? Is Julio on the other side of him? Then I start him. I mean, would you rather go with Mohamed Sanu here? (Expletive) no.

After Allen became so good during his rookie season, I felt the notion first-year receivers can't produce was put to bed. You can't expect them all to be good, but still.

With Tate and Floyd killing it, I'm sure former Notre Dame WR Tim Brown is mighty proud.

If you have Brian Hartline on your roster as one of those late-round fliers we're fond of taking, it's cool to move on to another option. He's nice, but not rosterable.

Sammy Watkins isn't going to make much of an personal impact with fantasy owners, but he will help Woods.

It doesn't seem right, but Jason Witten is no longer the dependable stud we all remember him as. Him and Antonio Gates carry the name brand numbers, but just aren't bargains.

ImageHave you noticed outlet malls have become just as expensive as your typical shopping centers? There was a time when you would plant one of those malls in the remote desert and you had to travel all day to get there. Now there are outlets in major municipalities. The rub is, they are less discount shopping centers and more bait-and-switch clothing dealers. It ain't right. The sports places are the absolute worse. You might find a discounted Anaheim Ducks shirt, but who wants that? Although I did buy a Battle of SoCal T-shirt just to let the Ducks fans know about it.


For the record, you can submit your fantasy questions to NFL Fantasy Live, Michael Fabiano or me on Twitter. But realize, NFL Fantasy Live has 220,000 followers, and Fabiano has 160,000. Me? Just four. See, the odds are better I will answer your question, so hit me up both via Twitter or via Facebook. And if you follow him on Sundays, he'll quote "The Wolf" from "Pulp Fiction" and then it's game on! Although, it's tough to catch me on Facebook. Twitter is your go-to."

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