I opened my inbox this morning to find a highly curious email: A letter -- seemingly from my own account and hand -- time-stamped January 2016. Sitting near a flock of pranksters here in the newsroom, I was sure it was a gag. Now I don't know what to think.
I called IT, but they're scrambling, telling me: "We can't trace it to an existing IP. You're on your own, pal."
Around The NFL editor Gregg Rosenthal's advice: Put it out there. See what floats in. Maybe others are getting Letters from the Future, too.
Here it is:
From: Marc Sessler [XXaddress redactedXX]
Date: Wednesday, July 22, 2015 at 5:39 AM [embargoed list-serv: Saturday, January 2, 2016 at 10:10 a.m.]
To: Marc Sessler [XXaddress redactedXX]
Subject: LETTER FROM THE FUTURE
This can't be real, you're thinking. But it is real -- you'll see in time.
The date -- here -- is January 2, 2016, one day after the ball dropped and 24 hours before Week 17 blossoms into a flower of chaos.
I'll soon explain how I sent this (and I'll prove it) but first there's something more urgent to discuss: the Dallas Cowboys.
- Here in January, I can tell you that it's been a comprehensive roller-coaster ride for Tony Romo and friends. Dallas sits today at 8-7, facing a must-win tilt against Colt McCoy and the Redskins. With a win tomorrow -- and a Giants loss to the Eagles -- the Cowboys earn a wild-card spot. A loss puts Dallas down for a long winter's dirt-nap.
Who knew Jay Gruden & Co. would trade RGIII to the Bills before Columbus Day? Who knew Colt would rip off three straight December wins, prompting Washington's success-starved fan base to call themselves "McCoy's McManiacs?" (Deeply cheesy.) Still, McCoy's owned in 88 percent of fantasy leagues right now and has a chance to put the 'Boys six feet under: Wild.
- Forget McFadden. That whole offseason pantomime over Dallas re-booting the team's clock-chewing ground game with a patchwork of underwhelming runners was a bust. The Cowboys don't come close to last year's run-play percentage of 51.6. Not with that raging pack of JAGs in the backfield, who leave Romo on the cusp of 500 attempts heading into Week 17.
- Dez Bryant fantasy owners win big. I won't spoil it, but his statistical output will be remembered for decades thanks to an attack that leans heavily on three-wideout sets after the bye. Cole Beasley's flowing blonde locks also become a thing: The feisty little slot man blooms into a fan favorite who easily tops his 37 catches from last autumn.
- Stay in bed on November 17th. Trust me.
- You -- and so many others -- tried your best with True Detective: Season 2. You re-watched episodes, pored through opinion pieces, even drove from West L.A. out to creepy Vernon/"Vinci" to better appreciate the plot. In the end: A tangled journey to mostly nowhere. But there's hope: the casting of Billy Bob Thornton, Jeffrey Wright and Natalie Portman -- in a plot based around mysterious animal sacrifices in Minot, North Dakota -- should make Season 3 a redemptive ride. Also: RIP Han Solo.