Super rich people are known to occasionally spend their money on stupid things. Joe Flacco is no exception.
"The dumbest thing I bought were ... how many did I buy? ... I bought a handful of massage chairs a few years back," Flacco said, according to the Ravens official site. "Like, the big Brookstone ones that put you all the way back."
It all unfolded one night as Flacco and teammate Dennis Pitta were playing cards with their wives (saucy double-date!). A TV commercial for a massage chair caught Flacco's imagination.
"I was like, 'What do you guys think? Should I get some of these?' " Flacco said.
"Of course Pitta, he's the ultimate peer pressure-er, the person who wants you to do dumb things. So he started getting in my ear about doing it. I might have gotten five of them, a couple thousand dollars each."
When the chairs arrived, the 6-foot-6 Flacco discovered he couldn't sit comfortably in the apparatus. He eventually gave all his inventory to a Ravens security official.
Our takeaway: Why did Flacco buy $10,000 worth of massage chairs? Was he imagining a scenario in which his offensive line would come over and just quietly chill in his basement getting massaged into slumber? It's a classic rich guy mistake: Buying five when one will do.
Am I the only one who remembers the hard lessons of MC Hammer's seminal Behind The Music episode? I am, aren't I. Whatever.