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Published: May 21, 2014 at 08:18 p.m.
Updated: May 27, 2014 at 01:58 p.m.

All-Game of Thrones football team

Hafthor Bjornsson, aka “The Mountain,” didn’t make it with the Colts, but that doesn’t mean the characters from “Game of Thrones” don’t have NFL potential. See which positions Dave Dameshek thinks each character would play if there were an all-“GoT” team.

29 Photos Total

  • QB - Arya Stark 29

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    QB - Arya Stark

    Critics will point to her lack of ideal size to play at the highest level, but Arya is from a family of field generals. Both her royal father Ned's and her royal brother Robb's busts - at least I think those are busts - are already in the Hall of Fame. She displays a chameleon-like ability to alter her style in order to win the situation, unparalleled footwork (thanks to her tutorship under star-making guru Syrio Forel), and an unflinching willingness to go for her opponent's heart.

  • Backup QB - Stannis Baratheon 28

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    Backup QB - Stannis Baratheon

    A wily vet who's open to new philosophical approaches, Stannis will serve the team well as it transitions to a new era. Or maybe he won't.

  • RB - Theon Greyjoy 27

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    RB - Theon Greyjoy

    A once-great ballcarrier now anxious to prove he's still got what it takes, Greyjoy reeks of a desperate need to be fed as many balls as possible over the course of 60 minutes.

  • FB - Bronn 26

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    FB - Bronn

    Although Bronn is an all-time great in the art of blocking for his higher-paid teammates, new questions are arising about his willingness to continue doing the dirty work now that he's gotten paid.

  • 3rd-down RB - Jon Snow 25

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    3rd-down RB - Jon Snow

    A "do-it-all" hybrid back who thrives in the snow and heat alike.

  • WR - Daario Naharis 24

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    WR - Daario Naharis

    He's got more swagger than T.O. and enough talent to knock any shutdown cornerback off his high horse.

  • WR/CB - Oberyn 23

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    WR/CB - Oberyn "The Red Viper" Martell

    A cunning and agile athlete, the Prince of Dorne is an asset to any team thanks to his ability to go both ways.

  • TE - Brienne of Tarth 22

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    TE - Brienne of Tarth

    Move over, Gronk: There's a new standard bearer at the position (as long as she isn't facing the Bears).

  • LT - Sandor 21

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    LT - Sandor "The Hound" Clegane

    A mauler who can absolutely take your head off, this frightening human being will fend off all hits, kicks and bites and still bring a controlled-but-ruthless aggression to keep the backside of his quarterback safe and sound.

  • RT - Jorah Mormont 20

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    RT - Jorah Mormont

    What Peyton did for Omaha, Jorah does for Khaleesi. In other words, he's focused on his job. He's got the ideal mindset for an offensive lineman: All business, all the time. You can skip on the hang time, though - he's kinda a snooze.

  • OG - Varys 19

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    OG - Varys

    He may seem a questionable choice given his lack of desire for human contact, but "The Spider" promises to outwit all comers thanks to his unsurpassed ability to study the weak points of an opponent in advance.

  • OG - Davos Seaworth 18

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    OG - Davos Seaworth

    Long in the tooth and undersized for the position? Sure, but he's got two qualities any team covets: Loyalty and the (recently added) ability to read the playbook.

  • C - Hodor 17

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    C - Hodor

    Concerns about his poor showing on the Wonderlic test notwithstanding, this team-oriented teddy bear should thrive when asked to repeat the one simple task of snapping the ball over and over.

  • DE - Gregor 16

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    DE - Gregor "The Mountain" Clegane

    Combining the length of Ed 'Too Tall' Jones, the brawn of J.J. Watt, and the nasty disposition of James Harrison, the 6'9" warrior is a pass-rushing nightmare personified.

  • DE - Tormund Giantsbane 15

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    DE - Tormund Giantsbane

    The Autumn Wind is a Raider, and so is this wild man - or at least he should be. The perpetually crazed look in his eyes framed by those fiery locks evokes a ginger-haired Lyle Alzado or Ted Hendricks. The only question is how he'll adapt to high-class spoils like climate-controlled domes and indoor plumbing.

  • DT - Samwell Tarly 14

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    DT - Samwell Tarly

    A native southerner who’s grown accustomed to cold climes, he’s a classic (space)eater who’ll anchor the run defense.

  • DT - Ghost 13

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    DT - Ghost

    Deemed by one talent evaluator as "the runt of the litter," Jon Snow's favorite direwolf plays with a chip on his shoulder bigger than Winterfell.

  • LBs - Daenerys Targaryen's Three Dragons 12

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    LBs - Daenerys Targaryen's Three Dragons

    They're young, but these gigantic triplets project to be top-tier performers based on their collective ability to fly to the ballcarrier. The sky's literally the limit for this trio - so long as the league never bans the use of orifice-issued fireballs.

  • S - Jaime Lannister 11

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    S - Jaime Lannister

    It's not a left-handed compliment to say this King's Landing product still possesses the moxie and experience to drop any fresh-faced passcatcher. If you were impressed by Ronnie Lott's ability to continue playing after losing the tip of a finger, you'll be positively blown away by this ex-right-hander. Added bonus: He really embraces a family atmosphere in the locker room.

  • S - Bran Stark 10

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    S - Bran Stark

    What he lacks in foot speed, he more than makes up for with his ability to get inside the opposing quarterback's head.

  • CB - Ramsay Snow 9

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    CB - Ramsay Snow

    Like any of pro football's most notorious enforcers, this cold-blooded assassin has an appetite for tormenting his opponents until they're little more than a quivering broken mess. (He also has an appetite for grilled links of meat.)

  • CB - Cersei Lannister 8

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    CB - Cersei Lannister

    While cunning enough to handle most situations, this former first-rounder can no longer get by on natural talent alone. If the whispers of substance abuse prove accurate, they'll very likely hasten her demise.

  • PK - Tommen Baratheon 7

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    PK - Tommen Baratheon

    Following older brother Joffrey Baratheon's choke in the big game, the toe-headed Tommen is now ready take over toe-oriented responsibilities for the team.

  • P - Sansa Stark 6

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    P - Sansa Stark

    She doesn't possess a lot of football talent. In other words, she's a natural punter.

  • PR/KR - Margaery Tyrell 5

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    PR/KR - Margaery Tyrell

    Things just seem to happen when this aspirational Highgarden product is in the mix. A true physical specimen, she shows a knack for working the field but consistently coming through clean on the other side.

  • Head coach - Tywin Lannister 4

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    Head coach - Tywin Lannister

    Hugs and positive reinforcement give way to the hand with enough pelts on the wall and gravitas to command the respect of even the biggest prima donna athlete. What Bob Knight did for college basketball, Tywin can do for pro football.

  • Offensive coordinator - Melisandre 3

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    Offensive coordinator - Melisandre

    Her bewitching approach will surely leave opposing defenses scratching their heads. She's a chestier Chip Kelly.

  • Defensive coordinator - Tyrion Lannister 2

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    Defensive coordinator - Tyrion Lannister

    Mike and Kyle Shanahan didn't always agree, but they still had their share of success. Likewise, Tywin and Tyrion might not get along personally, but their philosophies line up between the lines. No matter how Tywin tries to belittle Tyrion, Tyrion remains credible thanks to his memorable defense of King's Landing during the Battle of the Blackwater.

  • General Manager - Petyr 1

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    General Manager - Petyr "Littlefinger" Baelish

    Always two steps ahead of his foes, Littlefinger's as shrewd as they come. As a fringe benefit, his side business provides his players with the companionship they'll need to relieve stress before a big game or after a tough loss.

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