Best football scenes from non-football movies
- Published: June 8, 2012 at 04:46 p.m.
- Updated: June 8, 2012 at 08:06 p.m.
Great on-the-field football action isn't just for sports movies. Action, comedy, horror and even science fiction movies have featured football scenes. Here is a countdown of the very best.
19. The Dark Knight Rises
The scene: Hines Ward returns a kickoff for a touchdown as the field collapses around him in the new trailer for the movie to be released in the coming weeks.
Believable? I suspend belief for "Batman" (love the comics), but the thought of Ward out-running the defense is too much make believe.
18. Sorority Boys
The scene: Three guys posing as sorority sisters dominate a powder-puff football game against the rival house.
Believable? About as believable as any of these movies with guys dressing up like women.
17. The Sure Thing
The scene: John Cusack tries to impress the ladies by showing off some of his football skills.
What might only interest me: Of all of the things Cusack has done in movies to impress women, it still doesn't compare with him holding a radio over his head outside of a girl's bedroom.
Believable? Nobody does awkward guy as well as Cusack.
16. The Faculty
The scene: It's the big football game (complete with pyrotechnics, which seemed oddly out of place at a football game), as the hometown team destroys the opposition.
Drawback: Gratuitous violence and taunting that would never be allowed in a football game. Oh yeah, and then everybody turns into a monster.
15. The Brady Bunch Movie
The scene: Marsha Brady walks out into the backyard just in time to get hit in the nose by a football thrown by her brother. And now the big question is if Doug Simpson will still take her to the dance!
What makes it great: A direct callback to the television show.
Believable? Of course.
14. Starship Troopers
The scene: Rice and Zander fight it out in a futuristic football game, which looks like a combination of arena football and the video game Speedball.
Did you notice: In the future, football players don't wear facemasks, which means Mike Ditka must be president.
Did you notice II: Patrick Muldoon -- who plays Zander and steals away Denise Richards -- is the same guy who stole Kelly from Zack in "Saved by the Bell."
Believable? Well, the whole movie is based on space aliens that shoot asteroids from the rear-end, which then land on Earth. So the football scene seems believable by comparison.
13. Three Kings
The scene: Bored U.S. soldiers in the days after the Gulf War in the early 1990s tie explosives to Nerf footballs and shoot them out of the air.
What makes it cool: It's stuff blowing up, duh.
Believable? I have to imagine soldiers are pretty ingenious when they are forced to pass the time.
12. Walking Tall (2004)
The scene: Returning vet Chris Vaughn (the Rock) believes he's just playing a friendly pickup game of football with his old chums. But the bad guy, Jay Hamilton (Neal McDonough), orders his players to take out his Vaughn's knee.
Did you notice: Johnny Knoxville doesn't look too bad playing football.
Believable? Well, the Rock did play college football at Miami (Fla.), so sure.
11. Revenge of the Nerds
The scene: The nerdy Tri-Lambs get revenge on the Alpha Betas by breaking into the locker room and putting liquid heat in their jock straps. The players are so bothered by this, they forget to practice.
What might only interest me: The head of the Tri-Lambs is U.N. Jefferson, played by former 49ers and L.A. Rams player Bernie Casey.
Believable? Uh, sure. I can see Nick Saban forgetting to have his team practice.
10. Ace Ventura, Pet Detective
The scene: Kicker Ray Finkle misses a potential tying kick in Super Bowl XVII thanks to Dan Marino having the "laces out."
Cameo alert: Dan Marino plays himself ... rather convincingly, too.
Believable? A team mascot is kidnapped, followed by the quarterback being held by a police officer who was once a former NFL kicker who underwent gender-reassignment surgery. So you tell me.
The scene: Diminutive Lucas is crushed during a football game trying to impress a girl. But he ultimately wins respect for trying.
What might only interest me: Jeremy Piven's first movie role.
Believable? Hard to believe a coach would let somebody of Lucas' size on the field, but believable enough.
8. Not Another Teen Movie
The scene: There are multiple scenes in the movie, which obviously spoof "Varsity Blues." The ultimate was the one in which Jake throws the ball and the receiver is disemboweled (don't worry, it's a comedy), which I believe is more of a nod to "Lucas" as much as "Varsity Blues."
Awesome cameo: Mr. T was the wise old janitor in a later football scene.
Quote: "Be the ball, and throw yourself."
Quote II: "Do it for Marty's torso!"
Believable? I've covered a lot of high school football games, and no, I've never seen anything like that.
7. Forrest Gump
The scene: Forrest Gump is chased by a group of bullies through a practice field where he is discovered by Bear Bryant. From there, he goes on to become an All-American returner for Bryant's Crimson Tide.
Quote: Coach Bryant on Gump: "That kid may be the stupidest son of a (expletive) I've ever seen, but he sure is fast!"
Believable? Well, recruiting wasn't as sophisticated as it is today, so why not?
6. Flash Gordon
The scene: When Flash Gordon and his two associates are held captive against their will on the planet Mongo, the Jets quarterback tries to escape using his football skills. And like a Jets quarterback, he fails.
Quote: "Who are you?" "Flash Gordon, quarterback, New York Jets."
Believable? Better not ask me, I read comic books.
5. Point Break
The scene: Special agent Johnny Utah is undercover investigating a string of back robberies by a group of surfers known as "The Ex-Presidents." Utah and Bodhi (Patrick Swayze) get a little too rough during their beach football game.
Quotable: "Johnny (expletive) Utah! Sorry, man. Didn't mean to get in ya face!"
What might only interest me: Keanu Reeves has twice played an Ohio State quarterback in films (the other is "The Replacements.")
Believable? A couple of competitive guys taking a friendly game a little too far? Yes, it's definitely believable.
4. Hot Tub Time Machine
The scene: After traveling back in time, Lou (Rob Corddry) and Nick (Craig Robinson) make money off bar patrons by betting them on the outcome of the famed "Drive" game. But ultimately, they change reality.
What might only interest me: Well, in the movie version of "The Drive," the game is played in Denver and a squirrel can travel from Mammoth, Calif. to the Mile High Stadium in eight hours.
Quotable: "I know that squirrel!"
Think about this: In this "Hot Tub Time Machine" universe, the Browns actually go to the Super Bowl.
Believable? It's totally plausible, and trust me, I know. I write "Stargate" fan fiction (not really).
2. Wedding Crashers
The scene: Wedding crashers John (Owen Wilson) and Jeremy (Vince Vaughn) get caught up in an ultra-competitive game of touch football against the highly competitive Sack Lodge (Riley Cooper) out on Martha's Vineyard.
Quotable: "Hot route, hot route!"
Believable? A tough football game getting out a hand because some meathead is overzealous? Never happens.
The scene: Two army units serving in Korea arrange to play a friendly football game, with high stakes on the line. The 4077th win on the final play of the game, a variation of a fumblerooski, which sees the center tuck the ball under his shirt and run for the winning touchdown.
Cameo: Fred Williamson plays a neurosurgeon who serves as ringer for the 4077th team.
Quotable: "My God they shot him!" "Hot Lips, you're a nincompoop, that's the end of the quarter."
Believable? Why not.
1. Fast Times at Ridgemont High
The scene: Charles Jefferson takes out his frustration on Lincoln High School after he's led to believe a group of the rival's high school students wrecked his prized automobile.
Quotable: (Moments after the car was wrecked) "Relax, all right? My old man is a television repairman, he's got this ultimate set of tools. I can fix it."
Believable? Sure. I'd like to think this is how dominant Ray Lewis was in high school.