Chuck Pagano delivers coaching monologue of season


The NFL season is long.

This is especially true for head coaches, who who age like presidents during pressure-packed job tenures that demand around the clock effort. Take Colts coach Chuck Pagano, for instance, who has watched his team kick away multiple games this season all while his franchise quarterback sits on injured reserve with a bum shoulder.

As the calendar turns over to the season's final month, we enter prime territory for memorable head coach ... hmmmm, I'm not going to say "meltdowns", because that's too strong. How about memorable head coach ... rants ? Monologues? Yeah, let's roll with that.

Anyway, Pagano offered up a whopper of a monologue on Monday when asked if Indy's ever-increasing collection of painful defeats threatened to instill a negative Groundhog Day-type vibe with the team, a reference to the seminal 1993 Bill Murray comedy about a man who lives the same day over and over.

Grab a cold one and buckle up:

A few quick takeaways:

» I love when NFL head coaches accuse NFL beat reporters of being too occupied with their jobs to enjoy life. That is rich.

» Pagano made the first "dude and dudette" reference since Bart Simpson in 1991.

» Favorite out-of-context quote: "I jumped off the roof at my home this morning. It's not going away."

» Credit to Pagano, who is self-aware enough to realize his rant is going to go viral before he even finishes it. "Film your tail off, I love it," he says, sounding like an overworked Owen Wilson.

» The storm analogy hits us like a blitzer off the blindside, sure, but what Pagano is saying makes sense if you understand the nature of this lost Colts season. And everyone has that one friend or family member who is way into meteorology for no discernible reason. Pagano's that guy in his circle.

» I like Chuck Pagano. I don't know where he's going to be in six weeks, but I just want to go on record with that.