Colin Kaepernick's expert plan: 'Eat food and a lot of it'

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Colin Kaepernick is a study in irony. He's never been more famous -- he's on the cover of Time magazine this week! -- and he's never been less relevant as a football player.

Yes, Kaepernick is still a football player; the backup quarterback for the San Francisco 49ers. Chip Kelly has rolled with Blaine Gabbert for the first few weeks of the season, though it should never be forgotten that (cue up your best Iverson impression here) we talkin' about Blaine Gabbert, man. Blaine Gabbert.

At some point, you'd think a middling-to-bad football team that's starting Blaine Gabbert will make a change. The chance Colin Kaepernick plays meaningful snaps this season seems high. But when? Kelly has indicated that Kaepernick is not ready physically, that his body weight is still down after an offseason of surgery recuperation robbed him of mass-sustaining workout regimen.

Luckily, Kaepernick has a plan to put the weight back on. It's a simple plan. Some might call it ... an enviable plan.

"Eat food," Kaepernick said, according to the San Francisco Chronicle. "And a lot of it."

Kaepernick, for the record, believes he's ready to play now, though he acknowledges the team's assertion that his "weight isn't where it was." The goal is to get back up to his pre-surgery playing weight of 225 pounds. The man is a skinny football player right now. He'll have to change that.

And that starts with eating a ton of delicious food. This sounds amazing.

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