Ryan Fitzpatrick could shave beard for Larry David

I have no idea what's going on with Ryan Fitzpatrick's hair situation anymore.

He cut down the bouffant, which was wise and potentially vital to the human race. He retained the beard, which kept Mangold off his back. But then he shaved the mustache part of the beard, purposely choosing to look like a despondent Abe Lincoln. He lost me.

I'm not the only bewildered New Yorker. Seinfeld and Curb Your Enthusiasm creator Larry David is a big Jets fan, and he told The Dan Patrick Show on Monday that Fitzpatrick needed to clean it up for the kids.

"I don't know why Fitzpatrick can't shave, honestly. Why does he need that beard?" David asked. "That beard really bothers me. I don't know what this quarterback looks like. Who am I rooting for? Imagine Mickey Mantle with a full beard like that. It would have changed my entire childhood."

Fitzpatrick was asked about David's opinion after practice on Tuesday.

"Well, I've heard that he's a big Jet fan," Fitzpatrick said. "But I'm probably a bigger Seinfeld fan, so I don't take that lightly. I will take it into consideration, Larry. And I respect you very much."

David also said during the Patrick interview that he could be an NFL offensive coordinator, doubling down on comments he originally made last year on The Howard Stern Show. What did Fitzpatrick have to say about that?

"Pre-tty, pre-tty good," Fitzpatrick said, mimicking David's famous Curb catchphrase.

Larry David is, in many respects, the perfect Jets fan. Like David's character on Curb Your Enthusiasm, the Jets have an uncanny ability to get themselves into wildly awkward situations that play out with comical results. It really is a match made in heaven.