Super Bowl Viewer's Guide  


Gridiron Breakdown: Carolina vs. Denver


We've played all season to get to this. One last game to determine the new champion of the National Football League. The Carolina Panthers and Denver Broncos will meet in Santa Clara for Super Bowl 50, in case you hadn't heard. Everyone is going to have a breakdown on who will win the game and why. Don't bother. I've got your answer right here.

This is the only Super Bowl preview you need. I'm going to break down the important stats separating the Panthers from the Broncos and clue you in on which club is going to emerge victorious from the Bay Area.

Game on!

Person Panthers
Broncos Give it to ...
Inaugural season: 1995 1960 (AFL), 1970 (NFL) Denver. The Broncos won the first ever AFL game played and were the first AFL team to beat an NFL team. Most of the Panthers players are younger than the actual franchise.
Championships won: 0 2 Broncos win here. But their 2-6 record in Super Bowls isn't exactly stellar.
City nickname: "The Queen City" "The Mile High City" Broncos win again. Queen City sounds regal, but it also belongs to Cincinnati. Lame. Denver's nickname is also a double-entendre for some of its other (ahem!) legal activities.
QB dances: The Dab The Dad The Dab was co-opted by anyone trying to look cool and appeal to Millennials. Some of those same people dance like Peyton when drunk at weddings. Decidedly not cool.
Coaches: Ron Rivera Gary Kubiak Rivera. He not only won a Super Bowl as a player, but the "Riverboat Ron" nickname trumps anything Kubiak offers.
Celebrity fans:

Steph Curry

Trey Parker & Matt Stone
I love South Park as much as the next person. But how do you stop this on the BASEketball court? You don't.
All-Time Stars: Sam Mills John Elway With all due respect to the late Sam Mills, he doesn't compare to Elway.
Team Slogan: #KeepPounding #BroncosCountry Both are yawn-tastic, but at least the Panthers have put a little thought into theirs.

Sir Purr

According to his bio, Miles left the wild for Denver in search of greener grass. Huh? That fact alone gives the win to Sir Purr. If that doesn't do it for you, take a look at this.
Television: Eastbound and Down South Park Denver. Kenny McCormick >>> Kenny Powers
Music: Future ??? Okay, so Future is actually from Atlanta. But he took a picture with Cam Newton. That's better than anything music-related we could find for Denver. Shut it down.


The Broncos ran out to a lead, but the Panthers were able to close the gap and edge out a victory. Remember, this breakdown is totally scientific and completely predictive. Take the time Sunday to enjoy some good food and the company of your friends. The game has already been decided.

Marcas Grant is normally a fantasy editor for But sometimes he gets the foolhardy idea to write about other football-related stuff. Follow him on Twitter @MarcasG to let him know if this is a good idea.