Around the NFL  

 

End Around: J.J. Watt delivers a line for the ages

Print

Welcome to the Around The NFL End Around, a weekly look back at the world of the National Football League. Dan Hanzus serves as your guide.

It was a good week for ...

1. J.J. Watt: We're watching that special type of dominance right now. Jim Brown, Lawrence Taylor, Randy Moss kind of stuff. More on Watt later ...

2. Your Cowboys Fan Buddy: Man, just wait until he gets into that fifth beer this weekend. He's going to be the worst.

3. Ryan Leaf: The former No. 2 overall pick was released from prison this week. Not all the news is good, however.

It was a bad week for ...

1. Brandon Marshall What's worse: Being trapped in Chicago with Smokin' Jay or having your rib cage rearranged by a Mortal Kombat-level knee shot?

2. Johnny Manziel How could Manziel not be incredibly frustrated at this point? I get that Brian Hoyer is likable and working class, Ohio's Bruce Springsteen in the flesh. But he seems to be getting way more rope than he deserves.

3. Eric Decker: Decker's wife told TMZ that a lost Jets season has left the wide receiver feeling depressed. Was he depressed when that $7.5 million signing bonus check landed in his mailbox?

What The What?

Immediate thoughts:

» Oh cool, Jonas Gray is still alive.

» Gronk is a living cartoon character.

» Ugggggh ... Bieber

I'm not as plugged in on the alleged Bieber Curse as others, but I'll never pass on the opportunity to study Bieber, the great shining turd of popular culture. Check out the below Vine of Bieber striking a pose with Gronk. The pop star seems to be thinking to himself, "Did I ever get my GED?"

Gronk, meanwhile, is just a big beautiful monster. That dude loves life.

Are you smarter than a second grader? (Probably not)

Multiply 7 by 3 right now. OK. Did you get 21? Please tell me you got 21. Oh man, it's going to be awkward if you didn't get 21. OK, congrats. Now, in the same amount of time, multiply 97 by 93. You have no idea what the answer is do you?

That separates you from Brady Fitzpatrick, the 7-year-old son of Texans quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick. Check out the video above of the kid nailing the question under immense pressure. It might be more impressive than his father's six-touchdown game.

J.J. Watt has his NFL Films sound byte for the ages

Watt had a dominant game against the Titans on Sunday, but something tells us it's what he said before the game that we'll remember most.

"All I know is, you mess with me, you got problems!" will go down in the pantheon of great lines from NFL greats. Depending on how the rest of Watt's career plays out it could challenge my three all-time faves: LT ("Let's go out there like a bunch of crazed dogs!"), Singletary ("I like this kind of party!") and Shanahan ("I stake my reputation on John Beck and Rex Grossman!")

Tweet of the week

Speaking of Gronk, Packers rookie safety Ha Ha Clinton-Dix learned the hard way on Sunday that staying upright is a bad idea when trying to bring down the hulking Patriots tight end.

Here's the tackle attempt ...

Clinton-Dix is survived by his family and loyal Golden Retriever.

Odell Beckham is overdue to do something amazing

Perfect. Thanks.

For you nostalgia hounds out there ...

Matt Schaub pick sixes are, against all odds, still happening!

Katy Perry singles, ranked

As you probably know by now, Katy Perry will headline the Super Bowl XLIX halftime show in Glendale on Feb. 1. Perry has some solid singles, and as a man who's comfortable with his tastes -- whether it be music, women or beer -- I'll now present the definitive Perry singles power rankings:

1. Firework
2. Roar
3. Wide Awake
4. ET (Kanye version)
5. Last Friday Night

Moving on ...

That's a whole lotta neck beard

Tis the season to be hopeful

Just your weekly reminder that the good football fans of Western New York deserve a winner again. I'm just glad this guy got his decorations up before the Bills hit the Broncos/Packers/Patriots portion of their schedule.

Hero of the Week: Andre Johnson

Andre Johnson is a good dude. For the past eight years, the Texans wide receiver has personally footed the bill on toy store shopping sprees for Houston-area children in protective services' care. The premise is simple and brilliant: The children (and adults with them) get 80 seconds (80 being Johnson's number for the last 11 seasons) to take anything they want off the shelves.

Video game systems are locked behind glass, but children can claim those as well. This year, Johnson spent $16,266.26. He's pretty much the Anti-Scrooge.

Until next time ...

The "Around The League Podcast" is now available on iTunes! Click here to listen and subscribe.
Print

Fan Discussion