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Like/Dislike: There's something about fantasy teams

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What we are talking about:

  • Aaron Rodgers

    He's going to crush us, right?

  • Tony Romo

    Relax the back, dude

  • Dolph Ziggler

    Dude! What are you doing?

Whenever I see "There's Something About Mary" on the pay channels, you can pretty much clear my schedule for the rest of the night because I am going to watch through the duration. (Even through the "Buttercup" video.) Thankfully the run on the pay channels recently ended before the football season started, or I might never get to your questions on Twitter.

So I was pretty geeked when they had a mini-reunion on "The Rich Eisen Show" which can be seen on NFL Now, daily. They talked about a lot of the same talking points you've heard before. For example Steve Young was supposed to do the movie, but turned it down because he didn't want all the LDS kids to sneak into the theater to see it. Which shows you Steve is one of the good guys in sports. But we've heard that story before. I mean, I like to read the IMDB trivia pages.

But what truly shocked me was Drew Bledsoe was supposed to be the football player who made the cameo. Yep, Drew (expletive) Bledsoe.

Which was both weird and a surprise at the same time. Not a huge upset, mind you. The Farrelly Brothers are from the New England area and are huge Patriots fans. A lot of their films like "Stuck on You" were set in New England, so you can see that it would make sense. And who am I to judge? If I made a movie which called for a sports star, I would probably call Mike Trout to come out and do it.

But at least he's a huge star and people know him. Damn, Bledsoe might have tanked the whole picture. The reason why Brett Favre worked in this scene is that he was a big-name star even your girlfriend at the time would have recognized. Most casual football fans might not have got the joke if Bledsoe had appeared on the screen. They would have just assumed it was some handsome tall guy who Mary dumped. No, it had to be Favre.

And really, I was only a small minority of people who knew Favre was married at the time, so it did always strike me as kind of strange back in 1998 that he would do such a thing. Although knowing Favre how we know him now (and honestly, we know a little too much about Favre, a little too much), the scene has become even more hilariously awkward. Somewhere up there with Lance Armstrong's cameo in "Dodgeball." (Oh Great Caesar's Ghosts, Millennials, you haven't seen "Dodgeball" yet? I fear for your generation. Cinematically. I'm sure you'll be fine otherwise. [Not really.])

All of this had me noodle scratchin' too. What were the best NFL cameos in movie history? And by cameo, I mean cameo. Not the star of the picture. No Carl Weathers in "Rocky" or O.J. Simpson in "The Naked Gun" or Terry Bradshaw in "Cannonball Run". I'm looking for a straight cameo. Here is what I came up with.

John Madden in "The Replacements"
Mike Ditka in "Kicking and Screaming"
Alex Karras in "Blazing Saddles"
Dan Marino in "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective"
Lawrence Taylor in "The Waterboy"

Although, you might have gotten me with my own logic with Ditka in "Kicking and Screaming" here. A quick check of IMDB shows he's third billed. I might have to reconsider. Oh, and none of "The Longest Yard" movies were considered here, either. Maybe Deacon Jones in "Heaven Can Wait" should be on the list, too. This will be something we can research during the offseason.

In any event, I did kind of have to check out early. Was there any talk about a reboot? Because we are getting near that time for it. If I was going to fantasy cast a reboot of this movie, I would think you have to go with Emma Stone as Mary. James Franco as the Matt Dillon character. Jake Johnson as the Ben Stiller character. Rob Cordrry would have to be in this too, somehow. All right, all right. Give me some time to think about this.

Of course, the ultimate question would be, who plays the NFL player who makes the cameo? Does it have to be a quarterback? I mean, it must be one of the most high-profile guys in the league. Maybe it would have to be Aaron Rodgers, which seems so unsatisfying, but there we are. Hit me up about it on Twitter. Let's really dig deep into this.

A big hand to stats mavens Careen Falcone, Matty Fredrick and Mickey for dropping the knowledge. Oh, and our man Patrick Crawley debuts "Patrick's Corner" this week.

For the record, Bledsoe turned the movie role down. Turned it down. Hahaha. So he got pushed aside for Tom Brady and Favre. That's a pretty amazing feat. All right.

And without further ado ...

Even Akbar, the most ardent Peyton Fan Boy, has finally had to come correct this week about his hero. Some of the fan boys might have been able to write off the Super Bowl, but now the evidence of his disgrace in big games has become too overwhelming for even him.

Jay Cutler is going to need to show a little bit more for me to completely trust him as a fantasy quarterback this week. If you dropped him during the bye week, I wouldn't blame you if you refused to add him back to your roster. He's got something to prove.

It is so hard to fathom how close Chicago was to going to Super Bowl 40. The Bears played host in that NFC Championship Game. That might be worse than losing a Super Bowl to Peyton.

You always hear about health and safety, but does that not pertain to back injuries, too? I'm not a doctor and I won't pretend to be one. But when I hear a guy had offseason back surgery and then suffered two fractures in his back, I'd keep him on the bench.

I love wrestling and contact sports, so I do get some pleasure from seeing these guys compete. But I'd take some time off if I'm Tony Romo. He's certainly a lot tougher than I can pretend to be.

Did we not see enough of Josh McCown to avoid a quarterback controversy in Tampa Bay? Mike Glennon ain't great, but as long as he chucks it up for his talented WRs, I'm cool with him.

Eli Manning will get brutalized by those who like to make fun of quarterbacks. Oh wait, that's me. But he certainly didn't receive a lot of help from his stone-handed receivers earlier on.

Austin Davis has posted back-to-back poor performances. The most delicious way for this to play out would be for Washington to send Robert Griffin III to the St. Louis FC during the offseason. How can we make this happen?

Alex Smith was fine as a bye-week replacement in Week 9. But this matchup against the Bills is much tougher than you probably want to believe. The Bills have allowed the seventh-fewest fantasy points to QBs over the last couple of weeks.

I almost want to fire-in on Kyle Orton, too. He's played better in recent weeks. And by better, I mean he's been able to get the ball in the hands of his talented receivers and allowed them to do all of the work. But hey, it does work out to be points.

The true indignity in all of this is that I'm going to put in a claim for Sanchez and then not get him. I feel like the only one in the world who had repeatedly defended him over the years and this season. (Well, Dan Hanzus and Chris Wessling, too.) But somebody is going to fire-in on Sanchez because of the matchup and I'll end up with Eli or some (expletive).

ImagePart of me wants to be upset with Maryland for the refusal of its captains to shake hands with the Penn State captains. But there is a bigger part of me that is a huge jerk and loves a little drama to go with his sports. I'm not for blatant poor sportsmanship, just once in a while I like to believe the players on the field care as much as I do in the stands (which isn't often, especially in the NFL).

ImageI don't want to be too insulting to Chris Franjola because I understand the pressures of doing live TV. But as somebody who would want a more satisfying conclusion and wrap show, the "Afterword" really needs a few tweaks to its format. This is why I love Chris Hardwick and he doesn't get enough credit for the job he does on the litany of after-shows he does across the Nerd Universe. This job certainly isn't easy, and Chris does it with aplomb. And the problem for Chris is that he probably makes it look way too easy and people now take him for granted.

ImageBTW, is it wrong that I cringed more during "Afterword" than I did during the show which included a dude with his head blown off and some grave robbing? And the human version of the human centipede?

ImageOh man, if there were only some other TV personalities out there who are huge fans of the show and totally available to be there on Tuesday night. If only I could think of who.

Frank Gore has become less and less trustworthy over the past couple of weeks. The Saints have allowed the seventh-fewest points to running backs over the last month.

Jim Harbaugh has now entered the George Costanaza "I'm trying to get myself fired from my job" phase of his 49ers career. Even Jerry Rice has made the rounds to say Harbaugh is probably done in SF. Which is awesome. Do you guys remember the 49ers before Harbaugh got there?

Although I'm super quick to write off Ben Tate, he still has some ability and more importantly, a great matchup. And to prove what a guy I am, I won't erase this passage (or the West stuff) if it blows up in my face.

How bad are the Dolphins backup running backs seeing the team wants to rush Lamar Miller out there with a busted shoulder against the Lions who are super-legit against the run instead of going with Daniel Thomas or Damien Williams? That is pretty telling to me.

I find it hard to believe Darren McFadden is just 27 years old. I could have sworn he was one of my top picks when I did my first draft in junior high. He struggled to run the ball last week, but was fine as a receiver. I guess his one claim could be he is better than Maurice Jones-Drew. Who I could have sworn I also took in that league years ago.

Tre Mason has emerged as the best running back in St. Louis. But Jeff Fisher is on a quest to make life miserable not only for the 14 people who actually show up for the home games there, but also for fantasy holders as well. This isn't the best matchup, but understand your bye-week needs.

I remember when people thought Fisher was a shoe-in for the USC job. Lunacy. I wouldn't blame the folks in St. Louis if they felt the club was pulling a "Major League" on them. It's an apt reference. Go watch a movie. I'm not dumbing it down for the Millennials.

As a favor to all of you, I won't play SJax this week. I feel like I've said and written some things I won't be able to take back. So in an effort for all of you to reap the rewards, I will demure on this one. You're welcome.

There isn't a Buffalo running back I want to trust this week. Anthony Dixon is still the top guy, according to the depth chart. Bryce Brown still remains the most talented of the bunch.

ImageI saw a stat recently which said a large majority of the workforce is going to be Millennials, which is super. I'm growing a mustache for Movember and I told some kid it looked like the time when Chandler tried to grow a mustache like Richard in "Friends." Nothing.

ImageIt actually got much worse. A (expletive) Millennial was in the lunch line the other day talking about a Halloween party. He said it was 80s themed so he and his girlfriend went as (wait for it) Kurt Cobain and Courtney Love. And yes, I'm certainly the (expletive) who had to call him out on that. I know; I'm a super fun guy in the lunch line.

ImageMy man Brandon makes a great case as to why Dolph Ziggler is doing the dumbest thing possible as he joined Team Cena in his latest Best and Worst. Faces are typically the dumbest guys on the show, so I guess it's wrestling tradition to just kind of forget Cena (expletive) all over Ziggler. But it's actually like that in real life. I watch my neighbors create drama and flip-flop all the time on who likes who, and who is in this click. Or "Kliq" if you will. I swear, the people switch sides more often than Big Show and Mark Henry, so it's hard to keep track.

ImagePoor Zack Ryder. If I was a WWE wrestler who finally got a push and they said, "Yeah you're working with Cena," I would totally bail. Which makes me fear for Dean Ambrose right now.

I realize I've jumped way off the rails when it comes to fantasy football. But how many of you can afford to sit any of the running backs you have on your roster right now? One of my friends told me he had to start Peyton Hillis this week. Can you imagine that?

When you think of the Browns, one of their lasting contributions to the NFL landscape over the past decade is drafting Johnny Football and getting Hillis on the Madden cover. That to me might be more impressive than the Super Bowl.

I'm so mad at Lovie Smith and the Bucs right now. Can somebody just please rescue Mike Glennon from that team? To reiterate an earlier point, Mike Evans and Vincent Jackson both played a lot better with Glennon at the helm. Now their fantasy value takes a huge hit.

I'd like to see the Cardinals make a move to get Glennon as a backup during the offseason. Too often we dismiss these quarterbacks who don't get the benefit of good coaching. See Sanchez, Mark.

Speaking of the Cardinals, they have become much like the Saints where they have a ton of good receivers, and yet you can't really trust one in fantasy. I'd like to start Michael Floyd but he's been very inconsistent. And good luck trying to pick between John Brown and Jaron Brown.

The Cardinals receiver to play is, wait for it, Larry Fitzgerald. That's right. He's out-performed them all still. I would only count him as a WR3, though. And the week we do it, Floyd goes crazy.

Michael Crabtree is going on one of those epic runs the moment we give up on him, he plays the best football of his life. Don't act like you don't see that (expletive) coming.

I like Steve Smith Sr. a lot. He's one of my favorite dudes in the league. But we have given him a little bit too much run lately without the return on investment. Torrey Smith has started to catch touchdowns, too. But dangit, Triple S always seems to rise up when you count him out the most.

I kind of wish the Houston Texans were playing this week so I could once again tell you how much I don't believe in Andre Johnson. All right, I might just be killing space here. I do hope Ryan Mallett can help increase his value. The only question I would have for him is if he can get the ball near the end zone.

Rueben Randle is the Giants receiver I wouldn't trust this week. The matchup is way too tough, but I have to believe ODB has already lapped him on the field. I did like Corey Washington, who caught four of his five targets. Much better than Preston Parker who dropped everything.

I'm not sure I'm ever going to play Wes Welker again. The Broncos have way too many options on offense and Welker really isn't one of them anymore. You can even drop him from your roster.

So if Kenny Stills had the great game last week, does that mean it's now Brandin Cooks turn? Or is this the week Marques Colston plays receiver vulture in New Orleans? Actually, I consider all Saints WRs vultures of Graham. It's not cool, I tell you. These Saints receivers have long driven me crazy.

ImageOur home page editor and long-time Like/Dislike champion Patrick Crawley has been asked to contribute. Take it away Patrick: "I dislike the dog-toy industry. Toys for children last a lifetime. Toys for dogs last six days. You need to step up your game."

ImageI don't have children, but I know a lot of them complain about how they spend tons of money on toys and the kids would rather play with the box. Similarly, I used to spend money on toys for my German Sheppard Pappagorgio, and she would rather tear up a pair of shoes. So I'm right there with you, Patrick.

Sorry Zach Ertz, I can never trust you as a tight end. Not ever again. I'm so freaking sick of getting either seven or zero points from the tight end position. Even Graham has some games that aren't all that much.

Jace Amaro has started to get eclipsed in this offense. I mean, you look at the Jets now and they have some credible pieces to the puzzle. Which means the stone-handed tight end isn't the focal point we thought he might have been able to be.

DangerZone: I won't come out and straight-up recommend him. But Clay Harbor has a great matchup against the Cowboys who give up some significant points to tight ends. This might not be the worst play in the world.

ImageIn our society when people get (expletive) banned for everything, the fact there isn't a group out there protesting the use of Billy Idol's "Mony Mony" for a car commercial is probably the biggest upset since the New England Patriots knocked of the St. Louis FC in the Super Bowl.

ImageJust to know you're not alone. I drafted Adrian Peterson fourth overall in my League of Record. I had to release him like two weeks ago. And yeah, my nemesis Brent claimed him on Tuesday morning. Which if you ask me, kind of a (Richard) move. I know some people feel fantasy football is ruthless. But that's probably why those people eat Thanksgiving dinner alone, too. (Sorry if that sounded harsh, I'm still upset about the "Afterword" on FX.


For the record, you can submit your fantasy questions to NFL Fantasy Live. But realize, NFL Fantasy Live has 300K followers. Me? Just four. See, the odds are better I will answer your question, so hit me up both via Twitter or via Facebook. And if you follow him on Sundays, he'll quote "The Wolf" from "Pulp Fiction" and then it's game on! Although, it's tough to catch me on Facebook. Twitter is your go-to." Plus seriously people, I'm not taking your tweets after Midnight. I'm into the #HashtagWars via @Midnight.

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