The Fifth Down  

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Monkeys riding dogs, center screen passes top Week 16

  • By Alex Gelhar
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It was just another day in the NFL in Week 16. Peyton Manning threw for 51 touchdown passes. Yawn. Who didn't see that coming? The Bengals whooped the Vikings. Tony Romo led a signature fourth quarter drive to give the Cowboys a win. Yes, he is good at that, too. Maybe not as good as he is at doing this but I digress. Rather than focus on the storylines you've no doubt seen plastered ad nauseum on Twitter and this very site (like the Cardinals upsetting the Seahawks?!?!), let's take a moment to highlight the most unexpected (and expected) events of Week 16.

Monkeys riding dogs, herding sheep

No, that's not the result of an office madlib, but rather what transpired at halftime of the Bengals-Vikings game. This has happened before, but rumor has it Hollywood is in talks with the agents of the dog-riding monkeys about a possible movie franchise.

The center of attention

After 14 seasons with the Jaguars franchise, center Brad Meester is retiring after the 2013 season. So how did the Jaguars send him off in his final home game with the team? In absolute style, by letting him catch a screen pass from Chad Henne and rumbling for a first down. I've seen plenty of big men catch touchdowns on playaction passes near the goal line, including our own Warren Sapp. But a designed screen pass to the center? Pure awesomeness.

You are not as devoted to your team as this guy

Something tells me this guy has had better days watching his favorite team play.

His seat was right under a drain spout at Bank of America stadium in Carolina, but did he care? Not. At. All. I have mad respect for this guy. And you should too.

Lewis vs. Tannehill: II

Chalk this one up under the head-scratching stats category. Years from now, NFL fans will look back at the 2013 season and see that undrafted, journeyman quaterback Thad Lewis bested Ryan Tannehil twice in one season. They'll be baffled that this is the same Ryan Tannehill who was the eighth overall pick in the 2012 NFL Draft,  had a stellar sophomore season and has a wife that almost broke the internet in 2012. But then they'll discover who Tannehill's wife actually is and realize he really won in the end. Sorry, Thad.

Fantasy Football sacrificial lamb of the week: The Chiefs defense

In what was the championship week in many fantasy leagues across America, the highest scoring fantasy defense managed just one point. This is the defense that scored 15-plus fantasy points eight times this season, and crossed the 20 point mark five times! Typically, I reserve this space for a player (or players) who didn't perform during their team's winning effort, but the Chiefs' defensive collapse in the most important of fantasy weeks earns them the spot instead.

- Follow Alex on Twitter @AlexGelhar for updates on his hotly anticipated screenplay "Monkeys riding dogs: From zeros to NFL heros." He's expecting a seven-figure offer soon.


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