Pick Six  

 

Avert your eyes and hope these uniforms are never seen again

Congratulations to the Buffalo Bills for righting a wrong that has so long plagued the NFL. In other words, the Bills have killed one of the worst uniforms in sports history. Even the organizers of the XFL thought that the Bills uniforms were gaudy.

The Bills should put those uniforms in a crate and give them the same treatment that the Ark of the Covenant was given at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark.

With that in mind, here are some other uniforms that should be in that category.

Considered: Tampa Bay Creamsicles

This uniform actually works in small doses, as a once-a-year special event. To me, it's kind of like the winged logo of the baseball Angels during the early Disney years before the team went to the red uniforms. I always wear the Angels wings on the home opener, and then I mothball it for 364 days. A good idea with these Bucs beauties.

Pete Leabo/Associated Press

Considered: Browns' brown pants

What are the Browns trying to accomplish here? The Browns have one of the better uniforms in the NFL, and the all-white road uniforms are a pretty handsome look. Too many teams get wrapped up in colored pants when white jerseys and white pants are typically a much better look.

Paul Sancya

Considered: Panthers' powder blue

The powder blue uniform works well for certain teams. Think of the Chargers and the old AFL Oilers. UCLA has a handsome uniform, too. But the Panthers miss the boat here. I don't know if it's the silver, or the contrasting black, but these jerseys are pretty bad.

Patrick Semansky/Associated Pres

Considered: Giants' red uniforms

The first time I saw the Giants wearing red uniforms (and believe me, I see the Giants a lot because they are automatically on TV here in Los Angeles every week), I thought it was some new NFL program to keep players from hitting Eli Manning. As many know, quarterbacks wear red jerseys in practice to keep players from hitting them. I thought the plan was genius. Turns out the plan was really just a poor uniform choice.

Bill Kostroun/Associated Press

Considered: Some of these 75th Season uniforms

The NFL had a pretty nice idea of celebrating its 75th season with some special throwbacks for all of the teams. But then the Packers, Bears and Steelers ruined it. Do you know anybody who owns any jersey that looks like this? A lot of those old-school jerseys were cool. These weren't them. Alright, let's move on to the list.

Associated Press

Readers Choice: Broncos' throwbacks

Say what you want about these uniforms, but there is a certain charm to this jersey. In some instances, it is rather striking. And it reminds me of Canyon High School in Anaheim were I served as ballboy as a kid. But the readers on my my Twitter page voted this as the worst. I just don’t agree. And without further ado …

Ron Chenoy/US Presswire

6. 49ers' 1994 uniform

This isn't an awful uniform, if you look at it in a vacuum. But when you consider the great uniform that this replaced, it is pretty bad. When you consider that Super Bowl XXIX could have had one of the greatest uniform match-ups of all-time, it is even more troubling (seriously, check out the highlights from that Thursday night game last season, that was awesome).

David Longstreath/Associated Pre

5. Teams wearing one solid color

I don't know whose idea it was to wear solid colors as a uniform, but this practice needs to stop. Especially you, Houston Texans. The Texans have one of the cleaner uniforms in the league. There is no reason to even have a red uniform, much less make it all red. And can somebody tell me why the Titans thought this all-blue look was good? They make players look like infants in footy pajamas.

Associated Press/US Presswire

4. Unnecessary black uniforms

Adding black to a uniform has become gratuitous in the last 20 years. The most egregious is when teams with awesome uniforms ruin it by adding a black jersey. I'm looking at you, Detroit Lions and Arizona Cardinals. That's not good, people.

3. Eagles' blue and gold

There are a couple of things that work against the Eagles here. One, this uniform is ugly. But more troubling is that the Eagles have some of the greatest throwbacks available with those kelly green uniforms. Not only are the Eagles refusing to go with the better uniforms when they do go throwbacks, they also completely miss the mark like it's a Donovan McNabb bounce pass in a crucial game.

Rusty Kennedy

2. Seahawks' lime green

The Seahawks are another team that should have never changed uniforms, because the classic look is the best. But what in the name of the World League of American Football is going on here? Seattle has the greatest fans, and the MLS Sounders outdraw a number of baseball teams. But when it comes to day-glow uniforms, keep it to that version of futbol, not the American version.

Steve Dykes/US Presswire

1. We're the Flying Elvises … New England chapter

Hey look, I liked “Honeymoon in Las Vegas” as much as the next guy (even though the sequel, “Leaving Las Vegas,” was so depressing). But why did the Patriots think that having the flying Elvis on the shoulder pads of this jersey was a great idea? And that subtle pinstripe etched into the jersey is a horrible idea that spanned not only football, but basketball, too. Seriously, we gave up Pat the Patriot for this look?

Winslow Townson/Associated Press

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