Dameshek here. Maybe it was in honor of Halloween, but the amount of shame in Week 8 was positively scary. Fear not, however: I'm ready to make like Rick and company on The Walking Dead and clean up this mess. Matter of fact, let's get in the holiday spirit ourselves by breaking things down by dismembered body parts. Just remember, players and coaches: don't get angry at me if I call your name. Ultimately, I didn't put you on this list. You put you on this list. Let it begin!
Dez Bryant's fingers
Those out-of-bounds digits cost hundreds of thousands of fantasy owners the eight precious digits they needed to win in Week 8.
Vick Ballard's head
Neat play to win it in overtime, Vick...but let's not pretend the crown of your helmet hitting the pylon was intentional. Kudos on the good fortune, but shame on you: those six points didn't just mean victory for the Colts - they meant a loss for my team this week.
Doug Martin's legs
Yeah, yeah, he was plum spectacular in Minny last Thursday...but based on his generally underwhelming first six games, I had him on my bench for Week 8. I won't make that mistake, but is there any chance he'll repeat that performance at any point the rest of the way? Unlikely. Shame!
Dave Dameshek's brain
Along with leaving Martin out of my lineup last weekend, I had Josh Freeman on the bench...even after I traded for him just hours before! (If you're interested, I gave up Cutler and Leshoure to get him - a good deal...that didn't benefit me in the least in Week 8.) What kind of dope deals for a guy then doesn't start him? This kind of dope.
Now let's get to this week's viewer-submitted video Fantasy Shame nominee. All season, we're featuring our favorite tweets that use the hashtag #FantasyShame. Take it away, Robby Moore...aka @Joyful_servant.
Nice work, Robby. And sorry about what Reggie Bush did to you.
That brings me to No. 1 and the Brown Paper Bag of Shame, which this week goes to...
Calvin Johnson's hubris!
What other reason than a "that can't happen to me" attitude could there possibly be for Megatron to willingly appear on the cover of the Madden game this year? 12 seasons of cursed superstars weren't enough evidence? At this point, he's riding shotgun to Titus Young - and no matter what he does the rest of 2012, he will now serve as a cautionary tale for NFL players and fantasy owners alike. Cover that Madden cover with the Brown Paper Bag of Shame!