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NFL fantasy football: Shame Report for Week 5

Dameshek here. Week 5 is finished, which means it's for me to shine the white-hot light of shame on those who deserve it most. Just remember, players & coaches: don't get angry at me if your name is on this list. Ultimately, I didn't do this to you. You did this to you. Let it begin!

#5

His season has been nothing to cheer about. (Sorry, cheap joke. Shame on me.)

#4

I thought you were supposed to be his security blanket from Indy? But Joel Dreessen has been more reliable over the last fortnight. Joel Dreessen! Shame on you ... and shame on me for expecting a guy whose last name is just a disguised version of a lady's first name.

#3

Fred Jackson and CJ Spiller, RBs, Buffalo Bills

Going into Week 5, fantasy owners were asking which Bills running back was the better play. Turns out, it was a trick question. The correct answer is C: neither of the above.

And now for the Get Out of Shame Free Card

This week, we've got two! The first goes to ...

It wasn't a very good game, but my desperate team needed someone to step in for on-the-bye guys Darren McFadden and Mikel Leshoure, and Hillman's paltry contribution gave me just enough to squeak past Sporty Simmons (by .7, to be exact).

The next Get Out of Shame Free Card goes to...

The NFL's official scorekeepers

They changed Ben Roethlisberger's lateral to Rashard Mendenhall (vs PHI) into a TD pass, boosting Big Ben's fantasy points by five and giving thousands of owners a very late win.

#2

The NFL's official scorekeepers

If it helped thousands of fantasy owners win their games, it obviously means it cost thousands of other fantasy owners their games. The yin and yang of fantasy football. Now, back to the shameful.

And at #1, earning this week's Brown Paper Bag of Shame...

On Drew Brees' record-breaking night, Sproles went for a measly 3.70 pts. Robert Meachem -- who doesn't even wear a Saints uniform anymore -- had a vastly superior game. Who could've seen that one coming? (Not me.) As retribution, Sproles won't see anything this week while spending some time with the Brown Paper Bag of Shame over his head.

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